Wednesday, September 12, 2007
No matter how much I've done for him... I will never feel appreciated deeply by him. He'll never realise that he hasn't been able to allow myself I am being treasured by him. Rather he will only know how to hurt me further saying he knows I want to tell him he doesn't appreciate me or say everytime I cause things to such a mess between us. Today its his Birthday. He made no effort in creating time for the both of us as his father last minute wanted to bring him out for dinner and my plans were ruined. Friday he chose to be with his friends when 2 days ago he said he could cancel it just to be with me. This afternoon asked him whether he had time for dinner. He said he was too busy with his project but I still push my luck to ask whether he could squeeze in some time for dinner. I was dressed up today and planned to take him to dinner and get his Birthday present too. Immediately he said he don't know what time he can make it and tell me to eat first if I was hungry. Indeed I was as I hadn't eaten since yesterday night till that afternoon. I sent back a sms saying forget it and went home. Thinking, since he can't be botherd why should I? Tonight (12/9/07) when he said he was coming, I quickly went out to find a cake for him so at the strike of midnight, I could celebrate it with him. Last minute he say he was too tired and didn't wanna come. I said do whatever you want. The next thing I know, I was feeling hurt that my plan has fail again. I called him only to know that he was actually sleeping without calling me... I told him bout the cake I bought and he still have no signs of touched. I mentioned break up as I really feel no point... Really no point.... At the end of the day, I'm full of pain and un-appreciated...
